If only cricket was a Bollywood film!

Lee Fortis the pitch curator had spring in his gait as the pitch covers came off for the last session
Lee Fortis the pitch curator had spring in his gait as the pitch covers came off for the last session (PC: RevSportz)

Sharmistha Gooptu in London

In a parallel universe of Hindi cinema — best if it’s a Salman Khan or Sunny Deol offering — where single humans can move mountains, the tea break would have had an Amar (say Akash Deep), Akbar (say Mohammad Siraj) and Anthony (say Washington Sundar) pray together. Or maybe they would give blood together to the failed morale of their team. And Shubman Gill aptly stands as a kind of failed father figure, who failed to keep his family together.

And striding towards the boundary line as the ground staff roll away the pitch covers is none other than a grinning Lee Fortis, the pitch curator,  who had been at the centre of an altercation with the Indian head coach Gautam Gambhir. Sadly it has been England’s day and Fortis looked very pleased as he strode away.

The Indian fans are still calling for a ‘Jaddu’ or an ‘Akash’ or ‘Siraj’ — a little bit delirious from all that beer and possibly zoned out from the total collapse.

However this is not a Ghadar or a Sunny Deol movie, not the world of Karan Johar where magic happens in the last half hour! As we wait here for the last overs to be played, a general feeling of gloom surrounds the Indian media contingent, even as the English supporters have their day — they have literally booed us out of our wits.

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